From Nothing to Everything (and more)

Eye-Opening Moments are real-life stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives intertwined. In this episode you will hear about From Nothing to Everything & Make My Day.

Website: https://inspiremereads.com
Books: https://amazon.com/author/emily-kay-tan.2021_

Chapters

• 0:21 Introduction
• 1:00 From Nothing to Everything
• 11:42 Make My Day
• 17:50 Key Takeaways

Transcript

Hello and welcome to episode #198 of Eye-Opening Moments where you’ll hear stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives intertwined. They are moments that can lift your spirits, give you some food for thought, or move you. For the introspective mind that likes to reflect, discover, and find solutions or meaning in a complex life, this is for you. I’m your host Emily Kay Tan. In this episode, you will hear about From Nothing to Everything & Make My Day.

From Nothing to Everything                                                                                                         

From having little to acquiring more and more, I thought I was a success. Having purchased houses, cars, and clothes of my own, I was satisfied. Then, I lost it all. The reckoning was detrimental, but the circumstances forced me to realize that I valued my possessions more than other things. With less, I unearthed precious gems, contributing more to my peace of mind and happiness.

Born into a low-income family, I knew to always save for a rainy day and to make the most of what little I had. I learned from my grandmother’s example. She worked hard for low pay as a seamstress, but she raised a family of six with my grandpa, a cook at a small restaurant. My survival instinct helped me do what I needed to live, and I valued what little I had. The practiced skills and some creativity helped me pay for my own college education and rent an apartment on my own. 

I began to meticulously record and track my income and expenses daily during college and never stopped the practice. Good at managing what little I had, I could buy what was necessary and a bit more. I never wanted to be in a place where I had to ask anyone for money or other things. All was fine when I was an employee. I even came to enjoy a middle-class life.

After attending a business opportunity meeting, I began to dream of bigger and better things. Eventually, I quit the career I loved in pursuit of making millions in business. After struggling for five years and living off my savings, I finally made a bit. But the global economic crisis hit, I went out of business and was broken into smithereens. Barely able to survive, I sold many belongings, subscriptions, cable TV, and anything I could sell. It wasn’t enough and I ended up selling my house on a short sale.

Each time I sold a large piece of furniture, a piece of me was hollowed out. The emptier my house got from selling possessions, the emptier my insides felt. Though clothed on the outside, I was embarrassingly naked and ashamed. I had worked so hard to purchase everything I had, but it was like throwing my things in the garbage because I could only sell them for a fraction of the price I bought them for. 

The accumulation of clothes I bought over twenty years was too much to sort. If it were up to me, I would keep everything because I value my possessions. But I would not be able to carry everything. I would need to let go. Holding up each shirt or top, I remembered shopping and choosing what I bought. I bought them because I wanted them, and now I was tossing them. I did not want to do it; it was too hard. 

I enlisted the help of my dear friend Selina. With all my clothes off the rack and piled high on the carpet, she quickly decided which I should keep or toss. She did it with such ease and swiftness. Of course, they were not her clothes, so it was a simple task for her. As I watched her do it, I cringed each time she tossed a piece of clothing into the donation pile. Sometimes, I would tell Selina why I should keep a piece, and she would remind me that I did not need it on the tropical island where I would reside or tell me it was out of fashion. She would reprimand me if I insisted and ask why I asked her to help. Selina was the friend I needed for this task. I knew she would be frank and try to knock some sense into me, which I needed. I was already too distraught to think straight.

With only three suitcases, one carry-on luggage, a backpack, and a purse, I arrived at the airport to leave everything behind me. I was moving abroad to have a new beginning. As Selina sat there with me, a strange sensation came over me. I felt light as a bird and ready for flight. It was odd because the lightness made me realize how much heaviness I had carried before that moment. The responsibilities and the maintenance of my possessions weighed me down. The unneeded things that cluttered my home pressed on me. Thoughts of the future and the past cluttered my mind to pull me down.

Feeling practically naked after I checked in my luggage, I felt a heavy load lifted off of me. With less weight, my insides could not hold me down. It rattled and shook like flickers of an outage about to happen. I did not know what would happen in my future abroad. As I boarded the plane, I left the past behind, and the future was too scary to think about, so I only had the present moment to observe whatever was before me. With no past or future, there was no burden. With only the present, all there was to do was to live. Less self-talk relieved my cluttered mind. 

Upon arrival to a faraway land, I had no idea what my future entailed. Everything that happened was nothing that I could have imagined. And I had a good imagination! I did not miss most of the things I donated, sold, or tossed. I thought I would, but I didn’t. I quickly learned that I could live without them and not feel any lack. They seemed so important to me that I had pangs of emptiness when disposing of them, but all my distresses left me when I arrived on the island.

Sitting on the floor of my new abode with nearly nothing in my visual spectrum, I thought of myself as a pitiful middle-aged woman who once had a beautiful house and more. And here I was in a one-room studio. I was already at the bottom of a pit, so the only place to go had to be up. With few possessions, it didn’t take long to unpack. With a small studio, I did not have much to clean or maintain. With the past left behind and an uncertain future, the gravity of the present told me to go out and explore. Out I went walking. Everything was new and different. Suddenly, I felt like a child full of curiosity and joy. I was never that kind of kid, but my logic told me that was what children had. 

Having no friends, I quickly searched online for language partners and found many people to meet, converse with, and go places. Back home, I never did that for social reasons, yet here on an island, I boldly stepped forward to meet many strangers and engage in long conversations. Leisurely sitting at cafes or exploring new places without a care in the world was better than I imagined. My new beginning was carefree and worry-free. I never understood how less was more until I got rid of most of my belongings. 

With few errands and chores, I had more time to explore and enjoy those hobbies I said I would do if only I had the time. Soon, I was traveling out of the country up to six times a year; I never imagined it possible, but with my carefree and worry-free spirit, I traveled like never before, expanded my range of perspectives, and witnessed different people and cultures. Though I had a demanding full-time job, I still had time daily to enjoy my hobbies and get enough rest. My five-minute commute to work and the convenience of cooked snacks and meal boxes nearby gave me more time to relax and do the things I enjoy that were unrelated to work or household tasks. Never did I have such an intense, time-consuming job and simultaneously have so much time to spend on hobbies and passions. 

Basking in paradise, I realized I had transformed from thinking I had nothing to digesting I had everything. After losing my house and most of its contents, I felt I had nothing and was in my birthday suit. I never want to go back to that place, nor do I want to feel those pangs. But it was that scenario that brought me to having everything. I rejoice for the freedom to travel far and wide. I celebrate all the moments I have to enjoy my passions, such as writing, podcasting, language learning, and traveling. Finding the most precious commodities, time and freedom, and fully utilizing them gives me my everything. 

Possessions were important to me, but they are no longer so important. More vital gems replaced the hunger to purchase much. When shopping, I ask myself, is it a need, will it bring me joy, or is it clutter that will create murky waters where I can’t see my gems? Time is a gem because it will never return once it is gone, and you can never get it back. We all know that, but if we value our time, we will use it more wisely. 

As I grow older and older, my time is running out. The fact tells me to value it now by doing more of the things I enjoy and doing less of the things that are a waste of time. I cannot delay because time will not stop for me. I must hurry and spend more time living as I wish, doing the things on my dream or bucket list. Freedom, another commodity, is only valued when you lose it. I have lost it before or didn’t have it before, so once released from prison, I never want to go back. Putting me back in my beautiful house would be nice, but it is not a must. Taking away my freedom or time would not be okay. I may have unknowingly allowed it to happen in my prior life, but no more. I stand up to have everything, bringing me peace and happiness. How about you?

Make My Day                                                                                                                                                    

I got to work, and Jane asked what I wanted for breakfast; I told her, and she ordered it for me. The food tasted extra good because she bought it for me. It made my day. Adeline told me she was feeling low and unhappy at work; I gave her some new perspectives and reminded her about her bigger goals and that the little upsets were minor details compared to her dreams. Seeing her face turn from the grumpiest look to the biggest smile that brightened her entire face warmed my heart. It made my day. 

Having endured a horrible day at work and feeling trapped in a job, I arrived home to my sky-blue walls and adorable baby teddy bears. I was immediately soothed, and all the day's irritations disappeared. Writing my daily positives, I remember being grateful for all I have and appreciating each moment of life. Make my day. It can come from me giving it to others. It can come from others giving it to me. It can come from me giving it to me. Making my day can come in three ways, but can I remember and do what I need each time I have a bad day or moment?

I used to love my job, but now I hate it. Hate is a strong word, but it is the correct word to describe how I feel about it these days. How can I live with this intense feeling daily? How can I stop myself from getting angry about something at work? Why are there always so many issues to deal with at work? I hate it, I hate it. How do I manage and make my day for myself?

I do what I need to do to get that paycheck and then jump for joy when I clock out because I have something to look forward to afterward. I have my passions to enjoy, and I have a peaceful and calming home environment. It reminds me to be grateful for what I have. How can I make my time on the clock better? I help other people solve their problems; it is part of my job, and I am grateful that it gives me the opportunity to help others, which brings satisfaction to me as I make a difference. During the idle times, I can do some qigong exercises, which will calm my nerves and remind me to chill because life is too short to be angry all the time. I can step out of the building at other times to get a snack. The few minutes of walk time is more relaxing and fun than getting the snack itself. When else can I sneak in some positive moments? I can silently bring my imagination to places I want to go and escape my horrid reality. Having identified some ways to make my day, I know there are things I can do to help myself, and I am not helpless.

I can pamper myself with a hot shower and a mask to relax in its coolness. I can paint my nails and put design stickers on each nail to make myself giggle because it makes me feel like a schoolgirl. I can sing, tell stories in a podcast, and write essays to release my voice for self-expression. I can take a walk and discover new places to give myself a fresh outlook. I can call someone and chat up a storm. I can do some calligraphy or listen to rain music; it soothes the soul. I can make a list of many things I can do to make my day and do it instantly. I can change bad moments into good moments by doing something or thinking good thoughts. A shift in perspective or an escape into a wild imagination or memory can change my mood. I need to remember all that I can do when I am angry. The power is in my hands!

I want others to make my day, so I look for the little spurts of sunshine that can come my way. Someone buys me a cup of coffee because it is a buy one get one free day. I am the recipient of the free coffee, and I am happy. It doesn't take much to make me happy, so I insist that all I need to do is look for them. I run into trouble at the photocopying machine and call for help; help comes, and I am grateful. Someone passes by me and says hi; it brightens up my day. I receive a text thanking me for helping someone do something, and it makes me feel good. I refill my water bottle daily and thank the company for giving me free water. I can find more things from others to make my day; I only need to look for them.

I used to be annoyed that people often looked to me to solve their problems or put out fires for them, but now I see that they need help and think I can help, so they call me. I am thankful to have the opportunity to help others and to exercise my creative skills to solve problems. Someone calls or texts me for help, and I leap to the rescue. I am glad a part of my job gives me ample opportunities to make the day for many people. When I offer suggestions or ideas to help people deal with their work issues, I am glad I have usable tools. When I am asked for information, and I provide it, I get a thank you, and that is more than enough to make my day, and I made their day, too.

I can make someone else's day with a kind gesture, a smile, a helping hand, or kind words. I need to do more of it. I know it feels beautiful on the receiving end, and I need to make more effort to give more often. Others make my day daily, and I need only notice and appreciate it. I can make my day by doing the things I enjoy. I make my day. I can make your day, and you can make my day, too. Let's do more of it!

Key Takeaways                                                                                                           

Though I had lost most of my physical possessions, I discovered more valuable gems to treasure.

Though gestures like a smile can be expressed, they can make a difference for many.

Next week, you will hear two real-life stories called Not Good Enough & How I Found Calmness. If you enjoyed this episode of Eye-Opening Moments, please text someone and ask them what they think about this podcast, or go to www.inspiremereads.com and leave a message. Thank you for listening!