Seen Naked (and more)

Eye-Opening Moments are real-life stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives intertwined. In this episode you will hear about Seen Naked & You Would Never Guess.

Website: https://inspiremereads.com
Books: https://amazon.com/author/emily-kay-tan.2021_

Chapters

• 0:21 Introduction
• 1:01 Seen Naked
• 8:46 You Would Never Guess
• 19:00 Key Takeaways

Transcript

Hello and welcome to episode #187 of Eye-Opening Moments where you’ll hear stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives intertwined. They are moments that can lift your spirits, give you some food for thought, or move you. For the introspective mind that likes to reflect, discover, and find solutions or meaning in a complex life, this is for you. I’m your host Emily Kay Tan. In this episode, you will hear about Seen Naked & You Would Never Guess.

Seen Naked
Hidden in the gray mud was my naked body. Visible in the hot springs was my bare body. It was all too uncomfortable. Soaking in a tub full of rose petals was me in the nude. Soaking in the bubbling hot tub was me unclothed. It was soothing and titillating. Why did my birthday suit feel different in different places?

My friend Maisy told me about mud baths in Calistoga, California, and asked me if I would be interested in having a mud bath. Since I never had one before, I was game for it. We drove several hours to get there. Prior to arrival, I had only seen pictures of it, and they showed a person’s head sticking out of what looked like a bathtub of clay. It looked fun. It never occurred to me that there would be two bathtubs of mud in one room, and I would have to get naked in front of my friend before disappearing into the mud.

I had never stripped naked in front of a female friend before, and it was most uncomfortable. She didn’t look uncomfortable, so why was I so uneasy? I hoped she did not look over at me. I did not want to be seen naked, but I was stark naked. I dashed into my tub of warm mud and was relieved to have my body disappear in the dark gray mud. If I knew I would have to unclothe in front of her, I would have backed out of going on this trip. 

It was fun while enveloped in mud; it was a new experience. It was as if the mud clothed me so I would not be embarrassed by being seen naked, and time seemed to swiftly pass by as we enjoyed the hour-long soak with gal pal conversation. However, it was soon time for my nude body to rise from the mud, and more awkwardness came. I was to move my naked body over to a pool of clear water to rinse myself off. Maisy and I had to soak in the water for a bit. I crouched over with my knees in front of me and sat on the underwater steps of the pool. Maisy did not seem bothered or uneasy like me; she showed herself without trying to cover any parts of herself. Why did she appear unbothered while I was so bothered with my nakedness? I didn’t know. I only knew I was glad to get out of the pool and wrap myself in a towel to leave. It was fun to be wrapped in mud, but it was no fun to be unwrapped and exposed.

My friend Mia came to town to visit me. She wanted to see the hot springs, so we went. I thought we’d wear our bathing suits and did not know that it was a naked affair. I was so naïve! We entered an area of lockers and showers. Many naked women walked around, and some sat combing their hair and dressing or unclothing. No one seemed uneasy and self-conscious like me. If I knew I would have to show my nude body, I would not opt to go on this trip. I did notice Mia’s large breasts that went with her skinny body. She had long hair and did not bother to hide her breasts with it. I would if I were her. I didn’t have long hair to hide mine. 

We walked over to the hot springs. The water was clear enough to see naked bodies. Mia seemed comfortable prancing around naked. I was not; I did not enjoy this naked trip. Mia walked around in the water, enjoying herself while I looked for rocks and shrubbery to hide from her. I didn’t want her to look at my body or give her the chance to examine me. I was too uncomfortable to enjoy the hot springs.

I wondered why my nude excursions with Maisy and Mia were so uncomfortable for me. Maybe I didn’t like my body shape, or I did not think I looked good in my birthday suit. I didn’t want to look at or examine my body daily. It must be because I had nothing good to say about it. It was never smooth or skinny enough. Perhaps I was afraid of being seen naked and judged negatively. I judged myself enough; I didn’t need someone else judging my body. And ladies, myself included, tend to compare and criticize each other. I do it, but never aloud, so I supposed they would do that to me, too.

Gavin invited me to see his new house and led me to the bathroom in his bedroom. Rose petals floated in the bathtub. He held my hand as we stared at the tub, and then he took my other hand to have me face him closely. We both said nothing. Gavin leaned in to gently kiss me for the first time. Before his lips could touch mine, I stepped back and fell into the bathtub, screaming! Before I could get up, Gavin was already in the tub, holding me and asking if I was okay. Before I could say anything, Gavin kissed me gently again and again. It was as if he was testing the waters to see if I would reciprocate. Soaked and covered with rose petals, the gentle kisses turned into passionate ones. Dizzy with my lips locked with his, I didn’t know when or how my clothes came off my body. I only knew that in my nakedness, I felt adored and beautiful.

Kevin said he had a long week of overtime work and wanted to do something relaxing. He picked me up, and we went to dinner; nothing unusual. After dinner, however, he drove us to a hot tub house. It was a place where there were private rooms with hot tubs. I had never been to a place like that before and wondered how Kevin knew of such a place. He said we could soak in the water to relax. I said I didn’t bring a bathing suit, so I was unprepared to go to such a place. He said I didn’t need one.

Kevin whispered, “I want to be with you.” I had known him a few years before we started dating. When we did start, things moved quickly, and sparks flew, but only on the surface. Once in the room, Kevin promptly stripped down and jumped into the hot tub. It seemed like he had been there before and knew what to do in such a place. He was at ease and comfortable in the room. Was he expecting me to do the same?

“Come on! Come relax!” said Kevin. Still not at ease, I unclothed, thinking my naked body would disappear under the bubbling water. But once in the tub, Kevin moved to French kiss me, and the titillating sensations disappeared my uneasiness. With all the bubbles, he couldn’t see my body, and I didn’t care. I figured he wanted to be near me, and that was all that mattered. 

Being seen naked by my female friends was uncomfortable because any judgment or criticism would bother me. Yet, somehow, it seemed to escape me with male companions. If the attraction is already there, you lean subjectively and positively. The difference in how I feel when seen naked reminds me to be comfortable in my own skin, and then anybody else will, too.

You Would Never Guess
You would never guess I love to talk because I appear quiet and shy. You would never think I would gallivant around the globe because I enjoy staying home. You would never imagine that I came from a dysfunctional family because I look normal. You would never guess if you only judged a book by its cover. However, if you ventured to see what was inside, you would be amazed at how the dichotomy could tie into one person.

I  appear quiet and shy, but I love to talk. You probably wouldn’t see me talking much if you walked into a social scene. If you saw me anywhere, you would likely see me not talking. As quiet as I am, you would notice me. Why? I don’t know. I try to be the fly on a wall, but people see me anyway. I don’t know why! Maybe, since I usually talk so little, I want to talk and have much to say. But if only you asked. In my quiet solitude, home alone, I want to talk to someone. Then it occurred to me that I like to speak, so why am I so silent? I haven’t the answer, but I found proof that I do like to talk!

Before going to the hospital to take a test at eight in the morning, the doctor told me I needed not to sleep the day before. I told my long-distance boyfriend this information on the phone at eleven at night. I didn’t know he would help me stay up by chatting with me from eleven at night until seven in the morning. I didn’t think I could talk that long! When daylight came and I saw the time, I screamed, “Oh my goodness, it is already seven; I need to get ready to go to the hospital!”

Another boyfriend I had previously called me one night, and I told him I had trouble falling asleep, so he said we would talk until I fell asleep. As it turned out, four hours later, I heard him snoring! It was then that I realized how much I was talking!

Kayla, a past friend, and I had breakfast once a week and usually spoke for two to three hours together. There never seemed to be enough time to chat together. Kayla once said her husband would be out of town on business, so she would have lots of time to talk with me. She asked me over to her house at noon for lunch. We were thrilled not to be limited to two or three hours of chatting. We talked while she cooked and ate lunch, and we continued talking even when we individually went to the bathroom! 

When Kayla went to the bathroom, she kept her door open a little and said continue, continue! And I continued sharing stories. We both could not believe we had talked for twelve straight hours! By the time it was midnight, it was me who said I was tired and wanted to go home to sleep. It was as if we were running a talking marathon! But we talked so much because we had so many things to share and enjoyed talking with each other.

After I wrote my first book, I did not think I would have another book to write because I didn’t think I had many more stories to share about myself, but I will soon finish my tenth book; it is unbelievable that I have so much to say! I now acknowledge that I like to talk and share. But I still appear to be a quiet person!

I appear to be a homebody; I enjoy staying home, but I love gallivanting around the globe, too. Home is where I can relax and enjoy silence. There is no demand on me from others, and having my privacy gives me calm. I appear quiet and like a homebody, but I am more than that. The Sagittarian me has an appetite to explore new places and roam any place I have never been. 

Even if it is just the neighborhood where I live, I want to roam the streets to see what is there. Where are the places that I would like to eat at? Where is there a park? What kinds of stores are there? If I needed or wanted something, where can I find it near my home? I wanted to know. 

Dreaming of traveling to many places, I didn’t always go because the limited amount of money and time stopped me, but after moving abroad, I was like a caged bird set free. Time and money no longer stopped me because I didn’t allow it. I explored Bhutan, the land of happiness, and reached the highest peak to see the Himalayan mountains across the border. I stayed in yurts in Mongolia and rode on a camel to the smooth and golden Gobi Desert. I climbed the Great Wall of China, visited the cemetery of Confucius, sailed on the Yangtze River, and more. 

I watched the sunrise from behind the Angkor Wat temple in Cambodia and witnessed children selling fruits on the dirt roads. I rode the elephants in Sri Lanka and went to the black market to pay a ridiculous amount of money in exchange for a little Sri Lankan money. I baked under the sun to see Thai temples and sailed on a boat to an island to use rifles and revolvers for target practice. I observed many sleeping volcanoes in Indonesia and saw many ladies walking, carrying, and balancing groceries in large baskets on their heads. 

I enjoyed the peaceful tea gardens in Japan and mused at how well-dressed the locals were, even on a Sunday afternoon. I stared at the many signs in four languages in Singapore and admired the clean streets. I mused the humorous and exciting stories of people who had cosmetic surgery in Korea and shopped to see many facial products lining the stores. I have also visited the Philippines, Malaysia, Vietnam, Hong Kong, New Zealand, and other places, but there is much more to explore! Though I love to travel, I am happy to rest at home before the next excursion. I am the homebody and the wanderlust.

I don’t look ambitious, but I am a dreamer and an entrepreneur. Poor Anson thought he married a schoolteacher and would have many children with a white picket fence. He did marry a schoolteacher, but she loved traveling and exploring small businesses, too. I joined a network marketing business and worked hard at it for five-plus years. I got to travel to conventions and drive to different places to meet with clients or prospects. I met many different people from all walks of life. I called it an adventure of a lifetime because I did many things outside my comfort zone, including talking to hundreds of strangers about my business and products and going to different places each week. It was wholly different from a job where you see the same people and go to the same location daily. Though I was not a success in that business, I learned and grew from it; I also researched doing other things besides my job as an employee. 

After dabbling in a number of different things, I found my passion. Podcasting and writing to express my voice gives me great satisfaction and contentment. I have a voice that wants to be heard, and I have many things to say. I enjoy talking and interacting with others at my job, but I also enjoy working alone in my writing and discovering eye-opening moments.

I look like I come from a nice family, but I come from a very dysfunctional family. My friends and acquaintances find me unique but normal. My strengths and accomplishments give no clue to a family that abhors being near one another. My character traits provide no hint of my dysfunctional family. But I think it’s abnormal.

I have an older sister, but Mom started with me. She had six kids, but at some point in our lives, she sent us all away to Grandma’s house, boarding school, or Uncle Sheldon’s house. Mom gave birth to six but didn’t seem to like kids. She felt the need to get them out of her hair. She compared us and pitted us against each other. There were no sibling relationships; there weren’t even relationships with our parents. If there was, it was negative. You rarely see our family of eight together because someone was always sent away except for the eldest. The eldest was daddy’s girl and mommy’s princess. The rest of us were treated like garbage. It is sad that no brother and sister relationships ever developed. I don’t know why, and I suspect my parents don’t even know why they created such a family. Despite coming from such an unloving and uncaring family, I turned out to be the opposite. Perhaps it was my way of fighting back or standing up to prove myself better than that.

Since you’ve opened the book and delved into some stories that explain a me that seems to combine two opposites in different areas of my traits, am I special or weird? I’d like to think a unique me was created from a family rarely together. In spite of this, I have done many more things you would never guess it was me. But isn’t that the spices that make for an exciting and meaningful life?

Key Takeaways
Though being seen naked was uncomfortable, getting comfortable under my skin was vital.

Though you may never guess something about a person initially, it is crucial to uncover some details to learn the complexities of a person.

Next week, you will hear two real-life stories called The Other Side of Me & The Third Kind of Smarts. If you enjoyed this episode of Eye-Opening Moments, please text someone and ask them what they think about this podcast, or go to www.inspiremereads.com and leave a message. Thank you for listening!