Under Surveillance (and more)

Eye-Opening Moments are real-life stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives intertwined. In this episode you will hear about Under Surveillance  and How to Deal with Impromptu Talks.

Website: https://inspiremereads.com
Books: https://amazon.com/author/emily-kay-tan.2021_

Chapters

• 0:21 Introduction
• 1:02 Under Surveillance
• 8:35 How to Deal with Impromptu Talks
• 14:52 Key Takeaways

Transcript

Hello and welcome to episode #140 of Eye-Opening Moments where you’ll hear stories of adversity, encounters, and perspectives intertwined. They are moments that can lift your spirits, give you some food for thought, or move you. For the introspective mind that likes to reflect, discover, and find solutions or meaning in a complex life, this is for you. I’m your host Emily Kay Tan. In this episode, you will hear about Under Surveillance and How to Deal with Impromptu Talks.

Under Surveillance
I escaped to an island nation after a devastating breakup and financial meltdown. It was to be the beginning of life far away from all my troubles and heartbreak. Immersed among strangers of a different culture and language, I thought myself safe and secure because I felt invisible among millions of people on a tiny island. I was wrong; I was under surveillance.

Everywhere I went, there were cameras. Shopping malls, subway stations, post offices, restaurants, and stores, big or small, were all fully equipped with cameras. Every room, hallway, lobby, and stairwell had cameras at my workplace. For an island known for its safety, I was surprised to discover the number of eyes monitoring everybody everywhere. There was little crime. Were the abundant number of cameras necessary? 

Perhaps all the cameras installed made the citizens feel safe. If criminals committed any crimes, police officers would surely catch them, and the victims would feel relief knowing that the authorities would find and arrest them. Robbers and other criminals would not have an easy job of doing what they wished. If you wanted to steal or kill, you would likely get caught. This island was not a place for criminals.

When I first arrived, I was too busy soaking in all the wonders I had never seen before. I explored big cities, suburbs, small towns, the countryside, and nooks and crannies. I was as carefree as can be. Engrossed and fascinated on foreign soil, I hardly paid any attention to the cameras. Like the locals, I felt it kept me safe, and I didn’t have a worry in the world. Life was good in paradise.

After some years, the honeymoon was over, and life in paradise was not so pleasant. I went back to America. What I once took for granted, I now appreciate. It was comforting to be back on American soil. I could enjoy fresh air, clean places, people speaking English correctly, individuality and creativity honored, various kinds of people and food, and privacy respected. There were no cameras everywhere to monitor everybody’s comings and goings. Of course, there wasn’t because that would be an invasion of privacy. And having your privacy in the USA is a valued freedom.

A few years later, I returned to that island, where I previously enjoyed a carefree and worry-free life. Strangely and unexpectedly, my viewpoint changed. Maybe it was because I noticed all the freedoms I once took for granted in America, and now I was elsewhere and lost some of those freedoms I enjoyed. Suddenly, I would look for where the cameras were situated. Instead of feeling that it made me safe, I thought it invaded my privacy. Seeing them in public didn’t bother me because I didn’t think anyone would be watching me unless someone was committing a crime nearby. If I were in danger, it would be good to have those cameras around.

My new home was like heaven. I enjoyed the peace and privacy. I was in my private world to do whatever I wanted without anyone watching me or knowing what I was doing. My privacy mattered to me, especially when my local co-workers were very interested in what I did with my life outside of work. I thought it invasive, but they were just curious about this foreigner who was different from them.

I have moments of forgetting about surveillance when I am busy working. The first time I came to work on this island, I usually forgot about the cameras because I was engrossed in work. I was generally in one room behind the front desk, so anyone could quickly find me when needed. However, I now work in a larger building and cannot escape it because someone will remind me. For instance, when someone is looking for me for one reason or another, I am amazed that they know where I am or will find me. My job has me move from room to room on different floors. So, I know they looked at the camera to locate me. Another time, somebody said she did not bother me or ask me for help because I seemed very busy with my paperwork. How would she know unless she was looking at the cameras? The intrusion is most discomforting and disturbing. 

I am hardworking yet always under surveillance; everybody on this island is monitored at work. It is unnerving. I am frequently reminded of it when people locate me to call me for help or to tell me something. How can my privacy be respected? How can I live with cameras all around me? How can I stop being annoyed by peering eyes? 

The simple or quick solution would be to go back to America, the land of the free. But why don’t I take the simple route? My simple answer is the cost of living here is much lower, and I can live a reasonably comfortable life here financially. Choosing to stay here, how can I live with the problem?

I resolve to find a way. Sometimes, it is comforting to know the cameras are there to keep me safe from criminals because there are few of them. At other times, my inner voice tells me that the more comfortable I am in my own skin, the less I will care about the cameras. The less I care about what others think of me, the less I worry about being judged. When I don’t care what others think of me, I free myself from the strain and pain. The more confident I am, the less I care about judgment. By reminding myself, I have more moments of feeling light and free.

When someone is looking for help or to inform me of something and find me, I can comfort myself that I am never alone at work. If anything were to ever happen to me, such as falling or getting sick, it wouldn’t be long before someone would know and come help me. There are good and bad things about being under surveillance. Focusing on the positives can only help me feel better. Crucial to comfort is feeling good about myself and not worrying about being watched. As long as I am confident and self-assured, I have nothing to fret about. What if you don’t feel secure? Award yourself confidence or declare it; be comfortable under your skin. If not you, who else? Freedom awaits you when you choose it!

How to Deal with Impromptu Talks
“Emily, I am going out of town. Please do the training for me tomorrow, “said Thomas. I went into panic mode. What was I going to talk about? What slides would I need to create to add to my talk? I won’t have enough time! Why didn’t Thomas tell me earlier? Why does he always tell me at the last minute? I hate impromptu talks! However, after I did several presentations without significant preparation, I figured out one way to deal with it. Still, I also discovered something that had me shift from an annoyance to excitement for impromptu talks.

Thomas hurriedly got ready for one of his business trips and once again said, “Oh, Emily, I have to go out of town. Can you do the training for me tonight? Ahhhhh, why does he have to tell me at the last minute again?! I told him before, tell me ahead of time! I need time to make a good presentation. Why can’t he understand that? Just because he doesn’t take much time to prepare for his training doesn’t mean everybody else can do the same!

Though Thomas often did not give me much time to prepare for my presentations, I would stay up all night preparing slides and the main points for my talks. I did not enjoy having to do it that way, so I came up with a plan. Since Thomas would not stop telling me at the last minute, and that was his way of doing things, I decided I needed to do something on my end to stop my panic attacks. My way of dealing with it was to have prepared presentations ready to go. So, when Thomas called on me to do a presentation, I would already have one ready to use! This strategy worked some of the time. It relieved me from the stress and pressure of it all. However, it did not help all the time.

Thomas still managed to catch me off guard some of the time. That is, I still didn’t have enough prepared presentations on hand! As I did more and more presentations, I noticed a few things. If I had ample time, I would get the job done. If I had limited time, I would still get the job done. Either way, I felt the pressure. I wanted to stop putting myself under pressure and feel at ease. How was I to do that? What was I to do? I knew I needed to do something to “work on myself, “but what?

I sat down to think and stared out the window. Something popped up. Whether doing presentations, writing stories, or relating to people, I had to be myself. That meant I would stop trying to impress others when I didn’t know what they wanted or expected of me. I needed to stop judging myself harshly because it impeded me from doing my best. I needed to stop caring about what others thought of me because it wasn’t helping me either. When I stopped, the authentic me came out, and that person shined with confidence and grit. Why? Being myself is effortless, and being anyone else requires too much work!

Standing in my own skin, I reassured myself. I needed to trust that being myself was okay because being myself was all I could do to be authentic. I spoke, wrote, and shared my experiences, thoughts, and knowledge in that position. And I wholeheartedly feel you can’t go wrong from there. I own me; I belong to me. You can’t make me wrong for being me. I stand distinctive.

I was once annoyed with impromptu talks or anything that left me little time to prepare and gave me panic attacks. With time, I sharpened my skills to handle unplanned events, and I am thankful for this life skill. However, a change in perspective and attitude had me shift from annoyance to excitement.

Having had to conduct impromptu talks, I learned to manage and reduce my anxieties. I also realized that many other things in life come unannounced in advance. And if we are comfortable in our own skin and willing to be ourselves unapologetically and acknowledge that we are unique, there is nothing to worry about. Judgments and concerns vanish; anxieties and worries disappear, too. Thus, our greatest selves step forward.

Once irritated by being caught unprepared, a new pair of lenses made me see that it was an opportunity to capture the genuine me. Being myself eliminated strain and pressure; it gave me space for full self-expression and leadership. The energy I exuded made all the difference. No longer concerned about what others think of me or my performance, I was free to seamlessly pull from the recesses of my experiences and knowledge and give the best talks to make an impact because it was from my heart.

Who could have known that impromptu talks could lead to a revelation of the self? Who could have learned that while many try to please others, they create more issues for themselves? The most remarkable but uncomplicated way to connect with others, whether in a presentation or one-to-one with others, is to be yourself: the unabashed, unique you.

Key Takeaways: Though I lived in a country with many cameras to keep me safe, I felt my privacy lost. However, I realized that if I am comfortable under my skin, being under surveillance doesn’t matter. 

Though others asked me to do presentations at the last minute, I learned to prepare some ahead of time, and any presentation is good when it comes from a place of authenticity.

 Next week, you will hear about two real-life stories called Taking a Walk with Someone  and God is Fair. If you enjoyed this episode of Eye-Opening Moments, please feel free to share it with others, support the show by clicking on the link in the description, or go to www.inspiremereads.com and leave a message. Thank you for listening!